Bubba Blue

Bubba Blue we never knew you 
Bubba Blue we never knew

Mamma loved you still 
those weeks she held you 
Those weeks she held you 
She loved you still

We thank God we had you for a moment
For a moment God gave us you

Time was too short 
But we so love you
time was too short
But you are still in our thoughts

Bubba blue mamma still cries for you 
but she knows Jesus had a plan
She knows He has you now
She knows you are in His hands

Rest easy bubba blue
Mamma and daddy will see you soon

For all of you who have ever lost a baby, whether it was very early on, further along or after they had been in your arms for a while, i know that hurt, the love that never leaves for the ones we have lost...

For me God is still good
He is still the Rock on which i stand
And yet will i praise Him

Thank you faithful readers for sharing this journey with me, i appreciate you and i hope that my life story can help to make your life story better in one way or the other

God Bless y'all

Jordan Boy

When i knew i had you my heart skipped a beat

When i felt you growing the secret we just couldn't keep

Imagining your little feet

Imagining your little hands 

Imagining your little heartbeat

Oh we thanked Jesus everyday for this blessing

We were so thrilled to be getting

Nine months went by so fast

And then you were here at last

Our Mighty Jordan 

Our Sweet Boy

Our Lords one

From a Tiny baby you grew too fast

my eyes tear at the thought of times past

I don't know if you will ever know

How much your mommy loves you so

Im Ever so proud of you my boy 

As the days pass on you bring me more and more joy

God has given us a gift in you Jordan Love

You most certainly are a true blessing from above

The thought of sending you off to school

Is just too much on this heart of mine

I want to hold on to you, to your youth, to your life

To these moments when we have all this time...

God has your future

I trust his way

Everyday for you i pray

I am so sorry for the mistakes ill make

Im so sorry if i cause you heartache

Im sorry for my anger, frustration and impatience

I was trying, believe me i was

But life takes its toll and sometimes i was lost...

I pray this prayer often

for you Jordan Boy

Lord What i do right multiply and bring joy

But Lord what i do wrong erase and help my boy

Give your heart to Jesus child

He is the only way that will make you smile

Life goes much to fast my child

But i pray that i will be here a while

I love you more than words can say

You are my Jordan

My Jordan Boy

Rough night!

Man talk about a rough night last night, first mistake was staying up late doing blog stuff, not realizing that the little ones were going to give me a run for my money all night long! Firstly firecracker my 2 year old was up about 4 times with what seemed to be a fever, because he was really burning up and he was shaking from heat to toe, poor little dude :( 
If im completely honest though and im not proud of saying this, all i could think was "PLEASE PLEASE just go back to sleep now because im SUPER exhausted, that lasted all night till he decided he wanted to come into our bed which was not going to happen because of Jesse being in our bedroom and easily woken, all till daddy had to end up sleeping on the couch with him (thank God for daddy!) I seriously applaud and take my hat of to single moms you guys are such CHAMPIONS! 
That wasnt the end of it because then the other little man was up a ridiculous about of times as well, and apart from being awake alot he was also really hard to settle every time he woke too.
Needless to say all of this made for a very exhausting and very moody and exhausting night...

I am so so so looking forward to little Jesse Bear sleeping through the night, but at this point i just cant see the light at the end of the tunnel because apart from moving him into his own room im not sure what else to do at the moment...

The reason Jesse is still in our room is that we happen to live in a lovely but super tiny 3 bedroom one bathroom house. 
It was ideal when we had just one baby because Jordan had his own room and we had a study and then our room, over the course of time though the study became a junk room sadly because our stuff just seems to have babies and grow more stuff!! 
Then we had another gorgeous baby boy and so he needed a room, but we cannot give him a room because the study/ junk room cannot be emptied because there is no where to put the STUFF GRR

So Hubby decided to build a HUGE shed out the back which is lovely because we have a really big yard and have enough space to do it and still have play area. As you can imagine there is a catch, hmm, the catch is that hubby decided to build it himself to save money which is fab because i have a very handy husband but he is also a very time poor husband (2 bouncing boys, a full time job, general home and garden chores etc) and so our shed is still not built...
So that means that little man Jesse is still in our bedroom and he is turning 6 months in 3 days time NOT IDEAL, and not what he really needs either, long story short i think this is why he is still not sleeping through the night and why we had such a Rough night :-(

I just pray that when Jesse does get into his own room that his sleep issues will resolve.

What do you all reckon??

God Bless you all 

Here's to a better night tonight :-)